"Oh, woe is me" they cry. It really bothers me to hear people whine about what little money they have. Specifically, I know a couple girls who are always complaining about money and not having it- thing is they both drink and smoke a lot and work only 40-45 hours a week... so... yeah...

Nearly 4 years ago my roomie moved out without notice leaving me with double rent on top of mounting medical bills... so... I got a second job and worked 70-80 hours a week. I stopped drinking entirely... not that I drank much at all before- but that's a luxury item. I dropped my cell and used just my home line- local service only; hardly spoke to anyone for months... not that you have time to call anyone when you work those hours nor would you want to if they're just going to complain about being poor when you're busting your chops to keep your head above the water. If I smoked I would have dropped that too- that's hundred of dollars a month I simply wouldn't have had. I didn't eat out. I didn't go out. No cable tv. No fancy haircuts nor clothes. Basic foods. I connected to the internet using a 56k modem. DIAL UP. Yes- $14.95 a month dial up. Eventually I got more on my feet and could start getting those luxury items again. I got a basic cell phone plan, DSL internet, and the occasional glass of wine.

Hence I have no sympathy for the two acquaintances who just raised their voices at me for "not understanding what its like to be poor". I'm not going to argue with them. It seems futile, but I do understand what its like to be poor. I just don't understand what its like to not do anything about it but smoke, drink, and complain about how hard it is.

Posted by James at 1:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I forgot to write down the license plate # of the truck that just hit me! I got his name, insurance company make of the car, policy #, etc but I was a little shaken up so it slipped my mind till just now! And now he's gone!!! I think I'll be fine though, I have his other contact info...

At 9:50am I carefully pulled into my work's parking lot behind an '04 Dodge truck when he came to a stop about 20 feet in front of me. The driver was looking around, apparently trying to figure out which of the 3 buildings that enclosed the parking lot he was supposed to go to. He looked around for about 5-10 seconds or so then put his truck in reverse. He was going slow so I figured he'd seen me and was waiting for me to go in reverse- there were two big trucks in front of him and I figured they were doing something where he needed to get out of the way. So he's backing up slowly, but he's not stopping and he's gone half the distance. I honked my horn but he didn't stop- he actually sped up. I couldn't believe he didn't see me- I reached for my stick shift to go into reverse while honking (I honked at least 5 times) but it was too late- he rammed into the front of the car.

I grabbed the insurance paperwork, got out, and walked toward him, "Oh man sorry about that" he said. I shrugged, "it's alright". He held out his hand, I shook it and he told me his name was Alan. I looked at the topical damage- the hood is bent out of shape pretty bad and there are some nasty scratches. "I'll grab a pen so we can share our information" and we did so. A woman ran out of the building to our right- "Are you Alan?!"

The man turned to her, "Yep, that's me."
    "Oh no!" she exclaimed surveying the scene. "Oh no, how horrible. Don't you just hate it when this stuff happens?"

No, I love it- I wish more people would crash into my non-moving car while I'm in it. I just love the rush.  ...people

And so that's how it went. I moved my car 200 feet to my parking spot. As I did I noticed it was making a weird deep hum- I can't tell where it's coming from yet but I'm assuming the radiator was damaged when it was hit. On the plus side it wasn't my car- it's my dad's since mine is in his shop getting (ironically) bodywork done. His insurance covers any driver and is more extensive than mine, so better his than mine. Kind of sucks though. Now I have to drive 3 hours to bring it back to him so he can get it into his shop and I'll have something to drive come Monday.

I hate working Saturdays.

Posted by James at 10:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I moved! Well, my site did. I was a bit tired of the annual meltdowns my site would experience at MidPhase so now my blog is at GoDaddy! YAY! One day I went to my site to write about some big life stuff and all I got were error messages. The foreign help at MidPhase was per usual no help at all- it took me forever to figure out it was a new "security measure" they did to their servers that blocked my blogging software from running. It's taken a long time to port myself over here but I think it'll be worth it. It's taken a lot longer than it would have if my life wasn't in GO GO GO mode!

I started a guerilla theater troupe in Boston ala NYC's Improv Everywhere. I built BostonSOS.org as our headquarters and have been hosting events left and right. It's pretty much consuming my life- on top of my 40+ hour work week I spend another 15-20 dedicated soley to BostonSOS related activities- working on the site, planning events, making props, doing research, editing videos, answering emails, interviews, etc etc etc. CRAZY! We were featured on the Bostonist weblog and even in the Boston Globe!

Now how to maintain two sites at once? Hmmm...

Posted by James at 11:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I've been saving the meat-email (or spam if you will) I've received this week about increasing the size of my penis. Apparently there's either a small penis epidemic sweeping the nation or women's vaginas are getting more and more cavernous, because the number of emails demanding I enlarge my member only seems to increase exbonentially everyday. Yes, I spelled that wrong on purpose. Got a bone to pick with me about it?

So why am I saving this week's meat-male? I mean- "meat-mail?"  ...because I find it amusing how silly the spammers are writing their messages to get around today's advanced automated spam-bots/junk filters. Hehe... junk filter. Anyhoo, when I saw the comic at the bottom from Married to the Sea I knew it was time to post them. Here are the headers from this past week's emails which in so many ways all sing a common message. My remarks are italisized. Yes, I spelled that wrong on purpose too.

• See your dic'k swelling day by day! (just slam it in a door!)
• Venture to become a super-lover in 2008! (and be faster than a locomotive, women love that...)
• Say YES to your new super-abilities! (paid for by the "Heroes Season 2 Sucked And You Should Too Committee"!)
• Bonus inches of pleasure (hooray for "units" of measurement)
• Massive rod is what you need to make your beloved lady adore you! (says the same African prince who wants to wire two million dollars into my bank account)
• Say NO to being small-sized loser! (JUST SAY NO! And vote YES on bill 39-43b.)
• Large pen!s is not a dream now! (are you still writing with those tiny, puny pens? don't you wish there was a big pen that could handle all your stationary desires?)
• Leave tiny dic'k size for losers! (i got nothing)

check out marriedtothesea.com

Posted by James at 11:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Its amazing how much press the No Pants ride got. We got covered by the Chicago Tribune too:

O brother, where art thou trou?

Pants-free 'L' passengers stay deadpan; not so their fellow riders

By Chris McNamara |Special to the Tribune

January 20, 2008

They gathered in the parking lot of the Baar Funeral Home, of all places, to receive orders on how and when they were to drop their pants, and the 30 young men and women were giddy with excitement, despite the temperature hovering around freezing and the fact that riding the "L" in your underwear is normally reserved for drunken hobos.

"We're not doing anything illegal," shouted Cesar Davis, who organized last weekend's local version of this no-pants train ride, an annual event staged at cities around the nation and created by New York-based goof group Improv Everywhere. "But if a policeman asks you to put your pants back on, put your pants back on."

They then marched a block east to the Granville Red Line station and got into character, which meant acting like the other train riders -- newspapers in hand, headphones in ears, pants on legs. But immediately upon boarding the train, trousers began falling and eyes began widening.

At the next stop he exited, along with a few other co-conspirators, and began a choreographed dance (sans pants) of boarding and exiting, turning the Red Line into a rumbling, absurdist theater where audience attendance was involuntary and admission was the swipe of a CTA card.

A train full of people in their underwear is insipid. A train where a few pantsless people exit at each stop, and a few others board at each stop, and none of them act as if they know each other or even recognize they're not wearing pants is inspired. "We want to break people out of the norm of everyday life," explained Davis, 20, of Rogers Park.

While the trou-dropping participants were mostly stoic, reactions from fellow riders ranged. Some were tickled. "What the hell is going on here?" chuckled Ann Adesida, as much to herself as to the boxered and boy-shorted guys and gals around her. Other riders stifled smirks until they disembarked, then burst into laughter.

Naturally, some riders were upset -- one women seated across the aisle from a pair of leggy young women alternated between staring at the exposed flesh and glaring at the falsely oblivious flashers. Another woman peppered a pantied pair with varied forms of the question "Why?"

Still others didn't even notice, so buried were they in books or music or sleep.

With participants constantly boarding and exiting, the "L" stations became part of the show. Pantsless riders stood on platforms waiting for the next train. Sisters Amy and Susan Singh, wearing sweaters that barely covered buttocks, drew catcalls from CTA workers. "What did I miss?" one shouted across the tracks, while his peers repeatedly muttered "Damn. ... "

"You forget your problems when you see something like that," said surprised passenger Tony Cruz between belly laughs. The Naperville resident was on the Red Line heading north, along with the skivvied set making the flip-trip to the Granville Station after regrouping at the Monroe stop. "There's nothing bad about this."

The Chicago Police and CTA security guards must have agreed; the pantsless riders got no hassles from authorities. After all, as long as certain parts of the body are covered and you're not acting lewd, underwear is acceptable in public places. (Davis researched city code and educated the group -- in full anatomical detail -- before they began.)

Sure, a few prudish riders got their panties in a bunch, but most who stumbled upon this scene came away with a fun story to tell. The characters who performed this screwball spectacle pulled it off by staying in character.

"What's your name?" a reporter asked a guy holding a Trader Joe's bag with a loaf of French bread sticking out of the top, as if he'd just gone shopping in his boxers.

"Why do you ask?" he deadpanned.

"Well, I'm writing about this event for the Tribune."

"What event?"

-----------

q@tribune.com

Posted by James at 12:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Brief shock for L riders

Chicago Sun Times

No pants? No problem.

About 35 people participated Saturday in "No Pants Day" on the L, an event organized by a New York-based improv group called Improv Everywhere.

Similar stunts were also planned for Saturday in New York, Boston and Washington, D.C.

Pantsless riders rode from Granville to Monroe on the CTA's Red Line and back again, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they weren't wearing trousers.

Some even carried briefcases and newspapers while wearing dress shirts and ties.

Shocked CTA riders who weren't in on the joke stared, laughed and made snide remarks, while others, such as Anna Looker, kept a straight face, as if nothing were out of the ordinary.

"It's sort of funny, but people on the L are used to ignoring everything ... even pantsless people on the L," said Looker, who was sitting across from two college students casually chatting about books in their skivvies.

Cesar Davis, organizer of Chicago's no-pants L ride, said causing a stir was the whole point.

"We're just trying to break people out of the monotony," he said. "We wanted to shake people up and give people something to talk about."

Posted by James at 7:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I had a "date" last night- or rather, a date was made to meet someone for dinner/drinks last night but neither occurred. My "date" was a total flake and it wasn't going to come to fruition anyway- and not regrettably; this is the same potential "date" that sent me those asinine text messages about "Whitney Houston" and "crack" a while back in the middle of the night. Funny how one always follows the other. I wasn't interested in meeting for a date date regardless- I just want to meet new people in general. Anyway, I was still awaiting the text at which bar we'd meet up at- I was given a meet up time of 9:45pm, just no location. Since I have better things to do with my time than visit every bar in the Boston metro area searching for one specific crackhead I decided to make unannounced alternate plans. Church in the morning, coffee hour, "I Am Legend" at the new IMAX theater, and dinner at Margaritas (old town jail turned Mexican restaurant) in my old town of Concord, NH with the parents. I had plans to go out again to Fun World (doesn't it sound like a world of fun?) with some friends but instead I just went to bed at 8pm. I slept for 13 hours. I normally go to bed at midnight and sleep for 7. I have a feeling I would have slept through my date had it occurred even if I wasn't tired, so this worked out well as my bed is better for my back than a bar stool. Note- slept through my date; date as in event. Not slept with my date; date as in the loser I'm not even interested in. So why even make a date if I have no real interest? Honestly I just like talking to people and my roommate has horrible listening skills. I'd join a book club but then we'd have to talk about the book- and unless it's a book about how fabulous I am I just wouldn't be too into that. Oh well, I suppose its better to spend an evening alone and quiet than talking with a crackhead. I'll have to ask Bobby Brown what he thinks.

Posted by James at 10:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I went to Chicago again. Yes- again, already- about a week ago. Much to tell, but I'm already behind on other things. For now I'll just write about my participation in the satellite mission put on by NYC's Improv Everywhere; this is the same group I did the MP3 Experiment with prior. I had already purchased my plane tix when i discovered they were going to do a No Pants subway ride (an annual event in NYC) in Boston. I was heart broken I'd be missing out; until a group in Chicago formed to do one at the exact same time (they even took into account the hour time difference). WOO HOO! No way was I going to miss out on this.

I was the first on the scene w/ the group organizer and hence became team leader #1. CLTV (a local Chicago station) showed up shortly after and were great sports; they hid their camera and even participated. I got to do the initial interview for them since our organizer is a little camera shy (but not shy about taking off his pants in public, go figure).

There were about 35 of us that met up in the Funeral Home parking lot across from the station, then about 5 more met us at the station last minute. Though over 100 people RSVP’d (including nation wide radio celebrity Carl Kassel) most of them (Carl for example) did not show up. I can’t say I was surprised. It takes a lot more bravery to take off your pants in public than it does to click the “I’m Attending” button on the Facebook event page. 40 was about 20 more than I had anticipated so I was happy. I have since written Carl about his horrible lapse in judgment:


I'm sorry but a :P emotion is not an acceptable apology for wrecking a young man's dreams.

We used 3 cars on the train so we had about 13 people per car. My team had the last car. At each stop a couple people from each car would take off their pants, get out, wait on the station, and board the next train. In this way of course that next train would slowly gain more and more pantless riders every time it stopped till it was filled with riders. In the initial train people would depants right before their exit stop- one girl in our car was amused that more and more people were removing their pants and exiting at every stop into the freezing windy winter air. She had a big grin on her face and did her best not to stare. I went commando. And by "commando" I mean I wore camouflage-print boxers. I got off at Addison which is an elevated outdoor platform. It was very cold and was filled with CTA staff. They noticed me but did not pay any attention- a guy in his boxers in public outside in the middle of winter. *shrug*



I brought my friend B (yes! the same gorgeous sexy B from the perfect date just a few weeks prior) along with me. B didn’t know what it was till we arrived and I said we had to take off our pants. After a bit of "you're joking, right?" the pants eventually dropped. B read “Civil Disobedience” which I brought along as an appropriate prop. I didnt have room in my bookbag for my own prop since our jeans took up most the space so I mostly just played with my phone.

After waiting for what seemed like an eternity in the frigid windy air (I had to pee… this only made me more uncomfortable) the next train came and I boarded. No one seemed phased but by then there were already 10 other people in the car in their underwear. A few hoodlums in the back were harassing people, shouting, making snide remarks at the ladies, then took out some marijuana and started to roll. They were amused and confused, but honestly I think they are usually confused in general so this was probably nothing due to the stunt. One girl got up and left the train early, presumably sick of the harassment, and presumably ran to the next car to rejoin the group. An older guy boarded the train and sat down next to where I was standing. He leaned towards me, “Hey, hey man- what are you all on?”

Me: “Excuse me?”
Man: “Whatchu think you’re all doing? Are you on drugs or something?”
Me: “What are you talking about?! I don’t do drugs! Never ever.”
Man: “Well where the heck are your pants? Is this some kind of cult?”
Me: “Uh… no. I’m not even from around here. I’m from the Boston area- I was just heading to see a show but I forgot my pants in a rush not to miss the train. I didn’t want to be late- I didn’t think it would be a big deal…”
Man: “Why are you dressed like everyone else then huh?!”
Me: *looking at my clothes, then around the car, then back at the man with a confused look* “What do you mean?”
Man: “You’re all dressed the same! You mean to tell me that ALL these people forgot to put their pants on today? Just what do you think you’re doing?”
Me: “Like I said- I’m from Boston. We don’t think this kind of thing is a big deal. I don’t know any of these people- if you want to find out why some of them aren’t wearing their pants you’ll have to ask them yourself…”
Man: “You’re all crazy…”

At the Monroe stop all us crazies would get off the train and board the train in the opposite direction, repeating the process of exiting at various stops to re-enter the following train. We all got off at Monroe, the three machismo losers much to our pleasure stayed behind- literally and figuratively.

To keep the logistics simple I assigned peeps in my group just one station for both directions. In this way those that were first off on the first trip would be last off on the way back. This worked out well since it gave people a chance to see things differently. Since I was the last person off the first time I was also the last person to re-enter. I had no idea till coming back (when I was the first back on the train) just how funny it was to see people entering the trains from the platforms with no pants on. I was deadpan the entire time save for two smirks I had to hide by turning to a window. How the regular riders could not be cracking up was beyond me.

When we entered the train on the way back I actually was able to see a legit positive reaction. Maybe because it was new to them since it was the first time in that car. Two middle aged ladies stared and giggled under their breath for quiet a while. On the opposite side of the car a lady with classic Bible-Belt style makeup and hair was clearly NOT amused. After a couple stops the woman couldn’t take it anymore and quietly exited the train. I was glad she was so polite about it at least- a kind of “if you cant say nothing nice don’t say anything at all” attitude apparently… or maybe she was scared speechless. Unfortunately for her she waited on the platform for the next train- the same train that we were all going to be on again in 15 minutes. I fear we created some kind of freakish personal hell for her in that way. “DEAR GOD WHY ARE THESE CRAZY PEOPLE IN THEIR UNDERWEAR STALKING ME- AND WHY DOESN’T ANYONE ELSE SEEM TO NOTICE THEIR EXISTENCE?!” I like to imagine she said to herself. I like to imagine that because I’m sick.

B was sitting next to a psychology student and his friend- the friend was reportedly freaked out and the psychology student was trying to explain it out in rational terms why someone would do this. He batted around a lot of different hypotheses but they eventually settled on it being a stunt for candid camera and motioned to me standing by the door “And see- that guy looks like Steve Martin- I think that’s Steve Martin”. This is all the more amusing as they clearly had no idea who Steve Martin is as I have dark hair, a beard, and I’m probably less than half his age. I decided to call my fellow alumni, Susan who I was hoping to visit during this Chicago visit. I left her a message- “Hey Susan its James. I’m in Chicago- are we still planning on meeting tonight? I missed your call since I’m on the L and we were underground. I’m just heading back to a friend’s to pick up my pants since I forgot them- but feel free to give me a ring cause I’ll be around and I have service now. Talk to you soon!”
Susan txt’d me back- “YOU FORGOT YOUR PANTS? THAT MUST HAVE BEEN ONE ROUGH NIGHT”. She wasn’t in on the joke yet.

All in all it went pretty well- minor hiccups here and there but people improvised which was the whole point- its called Improv Everywhere after all. One participant seemed a bit stressed out and was taking it very seriously, but everyone else just brushed it off and had serious fun. I got my picture taken by the Chicago Sun Times and got my 15 *seconds* of fame on TV. I just hope I didn’t bring any bed bugs back to the Granite State.

Posted by James at 2:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)